Blonde joke

So why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?....She kept throwing out all of the W&Ws!

Merry post Christmas (grins and groans included)

Hi all,
There was a request from one of Santa's reindeer to get back to posting because I been highly negligent with this thing...So, DANCER, I hope you're happy! (ha ha) Where's Blitzen, Donner, and Rudolph? Oh yeah, they were spotted sucking down brewskies and tailgating outside a Packer game recently...Word on the street is Santa isn't happy, they were late for "ye olde route" Christmas eve. Then there was the trouble with the GPS system and they ended up at the South Pole at one point.

I hope everybody had a wonderful Christmas, mine was good-restful and peaceful. I have a three day weekend from "the stalag", this is good-I needed some time off. It's been a rough last 6 weeks or so, didn't feel like doing much posting. My sense of humor left town and wasn't seen until last week. I managed to cut a finger and am still in the healing process. A fair portion of the nail went bye bye along with some of the flesh, so stitches weren't an option. The nail growing back into the wound has caused the wound to heal more slowly, so I have to continue to be patient. I've fashioned a splint that I wear to work so I don't hit it on things. Besides feeling like I've hit it with a sledgehammer (Ouch), it's also been a set back on the recovery-I've reopened the wound a few times. I've really been missing my guitars...I'm certainly going to appreciate playing alot more. I've done some slide playing, but for some reason wasn't in the mood. I've done some two and three finger playing, but really don't want to get into any bad habits.

So does anyone have any New Years resolutions? I have a few, but won't reveal them until later. Strangely, they've named a hangover cure after my old band in California, Chaser. Little did we know how commona name it was back then, there was another one in the SF Bay Area that we got confused with once in awhile. There was a Chaser up here in Alaska that was quite good, I made the mistake of turning down an offer to join them. Some silly thing called loyalty, which I still believe in, was the reason. But "bidness is bidness" sometimes. They were pretty much the creme de la creme of rock bands up here for a good long stretch. There was yet another Chaser out in the Aleutian Islands from New York, so by then I knew it was a fairly common name. So has anybody tried this hangover cure and...does it work? I've been sober for 7 years, but I can still remember how brutal they used to be.

Managed to get my minivan running (and starting!). Fooled around with the battery that was in it for a few weeks and realized that it was dead meat when a real cold spell hit. I was beginning to think that I'd really bought a lemon, I had problems with the door locks freezing up and not working. A towing charge and some other repair work later, it started. Then after work-click...nothing! My luck was running so badly that I was expecting an asteroid to come careening out of the heavens and reduce it to a smoking heap. An asteroid DID fly down into my parking lot, but got the vehicle next to mine! A new Sears Diehard battery cured it's disease. So fingers (the healthy ones) continue to be crossed, so far so good. If it dies again, I have a couple of moose who work cheap-or so they say!

I've been thinking of ordering a new acoustic in the next week or so, now that the holiday shopping deluge is almost over. I've been a good boy most of the year, so I deserve it right? Right! The thing is I'd really like to have the finger back in action by the time I get it, so I may put it off for awhile. I'd really like 2005 to be a springboard year--my IRS debts will be paid off in April and I'd like to get the recording gear too. I'm trying to get in more of a "Providence" mindset and get out of this "glass half empty" orientation. Let's just say I was more of a blind optimist back in my drinking days, most likely because I was busy soaking up a large portion of my paychecks every week. It tended to play havoc with any plans I had. But there is music to be played and songs to write, for my sanity if nothing else. I used to use my old acoustic for a sort of meditative experience, I've come to realize. It was very therapeutic. Just improvise and do a stream-of-consciousness type of treatment, some good songs have come to me this way.

However, I'm worried about my job. Morale isn't all that high in our kitchen. The owner/chef is in his mid 70's and is slowing down, I'm not necessarily in love with his attention to detail in running a business. A recent check was ridiculously short and I had to really keep my temper under control while bringing up the matter with him. At least it didn't turn into him yelling at me like he did in the old days. He now has been giving us a night off almost every week. I really need those hours...looks like I'm going to be doing some moonlighting for some extra cash. Our sous chef is thinking about taking a better offer, I hope he doesn't take it but it may happen. The old man did save him from a real bad situation in the Bay Area and got him up here again working, so there is a certain degree of that old concept, loyalty, again. However, the owner/chef has been extremely rude and disrespectful to him in the recent past, saying some really assinine things. So he needs to treat the kitchen a little better. I've been feeling like I've taken a step back since he bought the place back, I'm not making any desserts or more elaborate work like I was. At this point I'd like to get out of this business again, like I did 15 years ago and played music exclusively. However, things are a little more complex than they were back then...

I got some interesting gifts for Christmas-a Santa cap with attached beard, sideburns and eyeholes. Perfect for scaring small children or robbing banks-ho ho ho! (Yes, Santa wants all of the crisp Ben Franklins out of your drawer maam...It is the season of giving, after all-cough it up buttercup!) Also a Hendrix t-shirt from my sis, along with a--yo yo? Apparently, she thought I was a master at walking the dog etc, must've been the other brother Darrell...haw haw. I never could get much going on with those things. Another funny gift, some smoked fish from-Alaska!! (What?) I don't know what she was thinking--we CAN get lots of that stuff up here. Now I'm glad I didn't give HER the smoked salmon like I was planning...that would've been hilarious.
So, that's all for now---doe, a deer, a female deer....la dee dah dee dah dee daaaa....

-Sir Derek O'Hail
Honorary Irish Commander of the O'Weather